If I Had A Hammer: Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation

Categories Depression0 Comments

It was the last thing I would have expected; yet it came to me in a wave. Like its metaphoric oceanic counterpart it dragged me under momentarily, as I calmly embraced it. All the while I felt this intermittent jackhammering at my skull. Two or three seconds of jaw-clenching, brain-shakingly-intense hammering, and then 20 seconds of calm. This repeated cycle lasted for some twenty minutes. And somewhere in that stretch of time — it washed over me — this undeniable wave of sadness. What exactly…Continue Reading “If I Had A Hammer: Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation”

So this is 60 And what have you done Another year older And a new one just begun And so this is 60 Right now I can’t run With the way things are going, will I reach 61 … (Sung to “So This Is Christmas”) Danger, Will Robinson! Danger! This may turn into a Category 5 rant. For the faint of heart you may need to just go here. I know the preceding sounds a bit melodramaculous, and the following may be a bit over…Continue Reading “This is 60?”

Medicated Goo: Eight Months In: The Melting Mask

Categories Depression4 Comments

It started a few months ago; but I was not conscious of the fact. In the absence of heat, with the passing of seasons something sinister was occurring; slowly but surely. It may have been imperceptible at first, but as time passed it became more pronounced and identifiable — my mask was melting. Though I am not one to don one physically or metaphorically, this chemically produced mask hid something very personal from the general public — my depression. But as the last days of summer faded…Continue Reading “Medicated Goo: Eight Months In: The Melting Mask”

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Medicated Goo : Three Weeks In

Categories Medical0 Comments

Medicated Goo Steve Winwood & James David Miller So follow me, its good for you That good old fashioned Medicated Goo Ooo, ain’t it good for you? My own homegrown recipe’ll see you thru … Color me … Color me amazed! Color me purple, pink, orange or any other shade you care to. I’m three weeks into being chemically altered, by this “Medicated Goo” called Wellbutrin; more correctly the generic Bupropion. This Medicated Goo is good for you; well … for me. It may not be a…Continue Reading “Medicated Goo : Three Weeks In”

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Chemically Altered – Or How I Learned To Love The Pill

Categories Medical2 Comments

Chemically Altered – Or How I Learned To Love The Pill On The Road It’s been a long hard road, with too many twists, turns and setbacks. But I hit that road and I hit it hard; visited many a medico along the way — with not much to show, and little comfort on those cold, gray, dreary stretches of that godforsaken New Jersey highway. Granted, I did find a few good eggs and traveling companions along the way: Dr Berman, and Dr Kalyouseff. Then again —…Continue Reading “Chemically Altered – Or How I Learned To Love The Pill”

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Berylliosis vs Sarcoidosis = Misdiagnosis?

Categories Medical, Sarcoidosis0 Comments

hyoid-lie Sometimes I wonder … Is this live? Or is this Memorex? Am I awake? Or have I dreamed nearly fifty-nine years of my so called life? Yesterday, I had any one of those moments. Berylliosis vs Sarcoidosis = Misdiagnosis? The hour + drive up to Rutgers University Medical in Newark, NJ was pretty uneventful. A bit of construction still happening on the old Garden State Parkway — but nothing major. I made it there with time to spare for my 10:45 AM appointment with…Continue Reading “Berylliosis vs Sarcoidosis = Misdiagnosis?”

Sinonasal Sarcoidosis: Getting My Nose Out Of Joint

Categories Medical, Sarcoidosis0 Comments

It took a rather arduous journey to arrive here. From beginning to end, when foot met pedal, slip sliding through distant New Jersey neighborhoods, to arrive at my final destination — at least for that day — I was hoping for the best. The town of Montclair, New Jersey, was not all that different than the suburban town of Linden I grew up in. It may have seemed a bit more upper class, but even as a child that’s kind of how we all saw…Continue Reading “Sinonasal Sarcoidosis: Getting My Nose Out Of Joint”

Cataracts The Eyes Have It

Cataracts: The Eyes Have It

Categories Medical, Sarcoidosis2 Comments

I came to his office for an eye exam; and left with an uneasy feeling. Since having been diagnosed with Sarcoid, over 10 years ago, I’ve had to go for regular eye exams, along with regular lung exams. Usually pretty routine. But this eye exam was a tad different. When Dr Sergio Peneiras of Brighton Eye Care was done with his full exam, he started telling me my vision hadn’t changed since my last visit a year ago. I was flummoxed. It seemed to me, my vision had changed dramatically around…Continue Reading “Cataracts: The Eyes Have It”

Sarcoid @ Rutgers: Looking For Clues

Categories Medical, Sarcoidosis0 Comments

It’s been over ten years since the beginning. Presenting as a mystery, wrappped in an enigma, wrapped in a disease that has no end; but it did have a beginning. Back in Seattle, the summer of 2002 at Bally’s Fitness, I noticed my breathing becoming labored, but nothing I couldn’t power through. It was the start of something. Months and years passed. A host of symptoms came and went. It was still difficult to breathe on occasion, but nothing to set off alarms — yet….Continue Reading “Sarcoid @ Rutgers: Looking For Clues”

DHEA: Folks … we have a winner!

Categories DHEA, Medical1 Comment

Folks … we have a winner! No. Sorry. I did not win the New Jersey Lottery. I wish!!! But I have hit another jackpot—the diagnosis jackpot! Though I do believe it will be some time before I know if I will collect the prize. The prize being—feeling like I did before this all started. About two weeks ago, I went back to my endocrinologist, Dr Smita Kargutkar. She looked at blood work I had done a week before and shook her head. “Mr Streno, I…Continue Reading “DHEA: Folks … we have a winner!”